Leave But Please Don't
by alyssialui
Summary: Draco is still haunted by his past and gives Hermione the opportunity to leave and find her own happiness. Dramione. AU.


_A/N: Draco is still haunted by his past and gives Hermione the opportunity to leave and find her own happiness. Dramione. AU. Element of OOC Draco because how else would Hermione fall for him. _I do not own Harry Potter.__

_Submission for:_

_**Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry (Challenges & Assignments): **DADA Assignment #6 - Write a fic with the genres of horror, angst, mystery, suspense, or tragedy. Prompts: scream, echo, green, flash, "They won't stay dead."_

_**Hogwarts Fair 2014 Challenge/Competition: **Haunted Malfoy Manor - Draco/Hermione_

_**The "As Many As You Want" Competition: **Draco/Hermione, 'Rather Be' by Clean Bandit, 'Shut up and kiss me', his dreams had turned to ashes, 'Always'_

* * *

><p>He hates fighting with her, but sometimes he can't help it. There is a gnawing in the back of his mind. It sets him on edge and he can't think of anything except the feeling of despair and paranoia. Even after the end of the war, he is still looking over his shoulder.<p>

After a few days, he is like a time bomb ready to blow and the smallest thing will trigger it. He wishes that most times it wasn't her. He wishes that it wasn't usually over something so trivial a normal person would easily get over. But he is not normal. He has been broken and he continues to break.

She tries to be strong for both of them but he knows that there is just so much her heart can take. She knows she has her breaking point. And he knows he has just caused to her to reach it now.

He pads slowly from their kitchen to the bedroom. He has finally calmed down. The gnawing feeling has subsided, though he doubts it's gone for good. He has had a long time to think over everything and he knows he needs to do something.

She lies on her side, facing the wall and away from the doorway. Her head lays against the pillow, her hair splayed across the soft fabric and flowing down her back. He can see the shaky rise and fall of her chest and the soft sounds coming from her form. His heart breaks again knowing that he has caused her sadness. He has caused her pain.

He walks over slowly and takes a seat on the bed behind her back, feeling her stiffen. Her breathing stops and she waits for him to speak.

"I'm so very sorry, Hermione. I'm sorry you have to put up with me and my moods," he says softly. "I'm sorry for causing you so much sadness."

"I don't know how you've stayed with me for so long because I know I'm a ? to be around. I am truly grateful but I don't want you hurting at my expense. I don't like to see you cry, for any reason. Knowing that I've caused makes the pain worse."

"I try to be different, I try to move on, but I just can't. My past haunts me during the day and the night. Screams echo in my head and I see green flashes all the time. I try to kill these thoughts and feelings but they won't stay dead. It feels as if all my dreams have turned to ashes and there is nothing I can do to get them back. My life still feels like it's being controlled by a madman. I still have nightmares, who doesn't nowadays, but I just can't seem to shake them. I still haven't adjusted."

"I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you want to leave, if you want to have a chance at a normal life, if you want to find your happiness elsewhere, I understand. I even encourage it. I don't want to sap you of your light. I don't want to deny you your happiness," he ends softly.

She hasn't said anything during his whole speech and he wonders what she's thinking. He's knows she may not take his advice. It has always been in her nature to sacrifice herself for others. She has always had to carry the weight of others on her shoulders.

And it's not like he wants her to leave. If she does, he will truly be alone. He has no other friends he can call on, his other relationships all died long ago, and his mother and father are in no better state. She is all he has in this world. She is his life and without her, he knows he will die. But he will sacrifice himself for her. It's the least he can do for her.

She rises from her side and he sees that pillow is definitely soaked with her tears. Her eyes are red and there are twin trails on her cheeks. She stares deeply into his eyes and he feels an odd tingling sensation. In a few seconds, she will say the words he has been dreading to hear ever since they got together, but he knows it must happen this way.

"No, Draco," she says softly. She draws him closer her, his head resting on her chest. "Don't say such things. I could never imagine a life without at my side. I know things are difficult. I know you are haunted. I can see it in your eyes and I can hear it when you talk. I know you don't mean it when you lash out. I can take it."

He rises up from the bed suddenly, "But that's the thing, Hermione. You shouldn't have to take it. You should be able to live your life without constantly walking on eggshells around me and waiting for the foot to fall."

"I'm not walking on eggshells. I want to be here. I want to be here with you. I want to help you get through this. I want to be there for the good and the bad. There's no place I'd rather be than here at your side. I knew when I got into this relationship, things wouldn't be easy. I love you, Draco Malfoy, and I'm not leaving just because things are tough." She rises from the bed and embraces him, placing her head on his chest now. She giggles a bit, the sound a bit heavy since she was crying a few minutes before, "I'm stronger than I look you know."

He lets out a great sigh and says, "I don't what I ever did to deserve you in my life. I was a horrible little brat to you, a perfect spoilt monster. I called you names and never passed up a chance to degrade you. I began a criminal and ordered to be an assassin. I did terrible, terrible things. How did all of that lead to you comforting me in my arms."

She smiles up at him, "Fate has a certain way of giving us what we need when we truly need it."

He squeezes her tightly and says, "I'm so very sorry, Hermione. I'll try to be better. I'll try to overcome this. I don't want to live like this anymore."

"I know, Draco. I'll be with you every step of the way. Always. Now, shut up and kiss me," she says.

Draco happily obliges.


End file.
